If you had a time machine...

So, my fellow WAL-ies, what do you think is the answer to this question?

Now for my question.. What would you do if you had a time machine and could go back in time?

Sherminator? *giggles*

It can't be incest as that is yourself and the very definition of incest is sex with a close relative. Otherwise, every time you do the 5-finger shuffle you are committing incest.
Homosexuality it definitely is as you are the same sex as yourself (unless you have had a sex change in between the time of going back in time and the time you go to. Even then, some would argue that it is still homosexuality).
The only way that it could be masturbation is "the stimulation, by manual or other means exclusive of coitus, of another's genitals, esp. to orgasm", so it's not masturbation.

As to what I'd do if I could go back in time, I'd see if it was possible to change something noticeable in history to see if changing the past is possible. Maybe shave Hitler's moustache at one of his Nuremberg rallies or something?

That's definately gay sex imo.

If I had a time machine I'd go back, open a few bank accounts in my name, stick some money in them and let it grow over the years so I could be rich now (consequently be able to afford loads of gadgets, learn to fly, etc)...

Then, I'd go back to ancient Britain, learn the languages and document everything rather than let the old way of passing on history verbally lose it all. Silly ancient noobs. S'pose I could teach 'em to write but that might change too much of our history...

AND THEN I'd go back and see if things like Atlantis (and other mysteries) ever actually existed, for shits'n'giggles.

I'd assasinate Hitler. Not because of anything he did. Just because all the half-assed explanations as to why it can't be done that keep coming up in sci-fi get on my tits.

Gurfang wrote:

It can't be incest as that is yourself and the very definition of incest is sex with a close relative. Otherwise, every time you do the 5-finger shuffle you are committing incest.
Homosexuality it definitely is as you are the same sex as yourself (unless you have had a sex change in between the time of going back in time and the time you go to. Even then, some would argue that it is still homosexuality).
The only way that it could be masturbation is "the stimulation, by manual or other means exclusive of coitus, of another's genitals, esp. to orgasm", so it's not masturbation.

All I can say is... amen!

Crowley wrote:

I'd assasinate Hitler. Not because of anything he did. Just because all the half-assed explanations as to why it can't be done that keep coming up in sci-fi get on my tits.

But you can't. You'd either destroy our universe or end up in a parallel world where he was assassinated either way. Or both.

Well.. there´d be far more people living in the world if he realy would somehow get killed before he did it himself. Can´t decide if that´s a good thing or bad thing..

I reckon that if he had been killed before he wrote Mein Kampf then someone else would have probably done something similar. Germany in the 1920's and 30's was a mess and all it took was a few people to stir up the nation. What's more scary to think is that if it had been someone else, would they have been more intelligent and actually succeeded?
If it was done after Mein Kampf then someone would definitely have stepped up to the plate and based their ideology on his work.
If no one had done anything then we'd probably have ended up with the Russians invading with the aim of spreading Communism through Europe.

Why assassinate Hitler, when you can look to the Democratic Republic of Congo; Zaire; Honduras; China; US prisons; Japanese prisons; Australian asylum camps; US inner cities, or any number of other social abortions that "should not" exist but still do.

Humanity is still just (advanced) chimpanzees: armed to the teeth, aggressive (both phsyically and economically) and consuming more than it can create.

As for the gay sex, well I reckon most of the blokes here would have to chop their own hands off in that case

Opathu wrote:

As for the gay sex, well I reckon most of the blokes here would have to chop their own hands off in that case

It's so damn hard doing it with my feet.

Manovan Marrowsteel wrote:

Opathu wrote:

As for the gay sex, well I reckon most of the blokes here would have to chop their own hands off in that case

It's so damn hard doing it with my feet.

Start excercising today, and in 5 months of streching you´ll be able to bend down all the way with your mouth xD

Daidrax wrote:

Manovan Marrowsteel wrote:

Opathu wrote:

As for the gay sex, well I reckon most of the blokes here would have to chop their own hands off in that case

It's so damn hard doing it with my feet.

Start excercising today, and in 5 months of streching you´ll be able to bend down all the way with your mouth xD

Fascinating.