[Open PRP!] Bar Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight!

(by Vexacus)

Vexacus sped through the open plazas of Shattrath City, on the back on his Human Hide Chariot, pulled along by two enormous dreadsteeds. As he sped past the Aldor Bank, he lit a Fel Iron Grenade and casually tossed it inside towards some of the Aldor Guardians.

"Die, you squid faced goons!" he roared.

Laughing at the explosion behind him he reached for his snuff box and inhaled some more of the arcane dust deeply, before chugging some more on his flask of port. The front of his face and robes were covered in a mix of the powder and alchohol.

He whipped the dreadsteeds. "Faster! Faster! Now for the stupid Scryer Bank!" As he approached the bank, Vexacus spied a group of gnomes talking to each other just in the bank lobby, somehow unaware of his approach. He grinned. Lighting another grenade, he focused on the gnomes. As he approach the bank he was poised with grenade, ready to throw. "Your gonna die, die you foul midgets!" he yelled, and prepared to toss the grenade.

The gnomes looked up in time to see the crazed orc's chariot hit the prone form of a buky tauren lying on the floor outside of the bank. The chariot bounced up in the air, throwing the orc down in the back of it.

"Gnnnghhh..." Vexacus look behind him to the bank, now dissapreaing from view. He caught sight of the tauren's body, obviously responsible for the impact.

"DEY! DAMN YOU! MOVE YOUR BODY FROM THERE!"

Vexacus stood up just in time to steer his chariot down a ramp towards the lower city, narrowly avoiding impacting a wall. He finished his port and threw the empty flask at a startled beggar. He steered the chariot towards the inn where he had been told to me the others. As he sped through the lower city, snorting more arcane dust, a burning smell reached his nose. "Burnin? Hmm...". Vexacus looked down. "The bomb? The bomb!" He frantically lept down onto his knees and started searching around the chariot for the unexploded grenade...

At the front of the chariot, the two Dreadsteeds exchanged glances.

"He such an idiot" one confided to the other.

"I only let him summon me because I was bored." replied the other. "Such a crap warlock."

"True. I heard he clicks and moves with WASD." snorted the first.

"Haha, what a noob. Lets ditch him."

Vexacus stood up on the back of the chariot triumphantly, greande in hand. Excellent he thought, I can see the inn now, need to slow down though. His mouth opened as the two dreadsteeds vanished. "Oooh sh-" He crashed through the front window roughly about the same time as the grenade exploded....

(by Morgalyen)

All of a suddon Vaneras stood in the middle of the bar. Clearly confused by being summoned by noone to the middle of a bar with a large Orc flying by.
Vaneras walked out again muttering something about being in the sun at a beach.

(by Emanee)

Laid on the floor watching the pretty patterns flying through the air Emanee suddenly began to wretch spewing out a huge Hairball. As she peered the Hairball became a cat, and the cat she sort of recognised as Mika. She waved as Kafira floated past on a blow-up banana, blowing bubbles from a bottle of Darkmoon's finest.

(by Leaf)

Leaf manages to stop her powerful and reluctant air acrobatics by slamming the claws that were a part of her huge demoic wings into the ceiling, scraeping ((damn Blizzard forcing me to misspell!)) huge holes and causing stones and what-not to rain down on guests and workers of the bar, killing some and wounding even more.

The Gnome let's go of the ceiling and hovers in the air, pointing her clawed finger at Vaneras - her own eyes burning with the typical green glow marking her as a demon.

"You... can not escape me! Rrraaaagh!" she yelled with a thundering voice, shattering the ceiling more.

As she folded her enormous wings behind her body and dove against Vaneras, her left breast hit Vainia's gorilla in the face causing the Gnome demon to spin violently, once again having no control of her flight.

[ Post edited by Leaf ]

(by Drakarm)

Rather then fight, Drakarm and his band of merry men ( or women, the pink tuttues make it hard to tell )
decide to get up on stage while shuhei steals the gnomes banjo and begin to sing and dance to the very familar sounding tune while Archnazg sings ( in a very nice voice not unlike frank sanatra )

"fly me to the moon"

(( Put me in a dress damn you quin! >.< ))

There was a sudden detonation and an unconscious orc came flying through the tavern window. The blast threw Vypra off her table and she came to rest, somewhat dazed against the wall with Vexacus face down in her lap. 'Hey dere darlin', i thought ya was gonna miss da party' she looked down at his scruffy robes and smiled 'hey is dat a grenade in your pocket or are ya just pleased to see me?' Vypra reached down with glee '...oh, it is a grenade' she muttered in disappointment.
She suddenly grinned and jumped to her feet. She threw the grenade into the air and with a wave of a magic wand turned it into a giant disco ball. Then she turned, and with another wave of the wand, turned everybody into cute, japanese-style, super-deformed versions of themselves. Finally, she went wolf, grabbed the back of Vex's robes and dragged him off into a shady corner, her tail wagging.

[ Post edited by Vypra ]

(by Opathu)

All was fire. One minute dancing demons, mutated breasts, can-can girls who were undead men... and ping pong balls.

Then the explosion.

Two-Smile watched Quint's head detach (again) and sail past. A piece of what might once have been Vexacus flew out of the window. Lushan the beggar had activated his L33tshire Abbey PRP ForceShield and was beamed up back to the space station in the flick of an eye.

Intense heat, pain ... then... nothing.

Opathu woke up. He couldn't feel or hear. Perhaps it was a dream... a night out with Kasp and Ordin smoking the crack pipe nightmare, but a dream nonetheless.

He began to turn his head. HER FACE!

- from the shadows Kethin lept upon the recumbent orc and began her dastardly work.

(by Elendori)

The communicator, built under his skin, crackled into life.

"... sst .. buzz... et to Shattrath NOW! Major PRP... shhttzzz"

The commander slapped down his wrist sub-demeral vent and turned to his comrades. A giant, a demon, a vampire, a seductress, a terrible dark glowing hooded man who did little but seemed to follow them around and scare little children... plus a bouncing gnome with the name "IPWNDU".

"Saddle up heroes! Tonight, the Goldshire PRP Hit Squad has been summoned. We ride forth to great valor and deeds..."

"Can it squid-chops," said the seductress. "I'm gonna pwn me some Horde."

She lept up into the sky, summoning great clouds to carry her to the other world. The others swiftly followed.

"By the power of Greyskull," the Draenei muttered. "I wish I could do that..." He bounced off at triple speed, sparing only a /spit for a young beggar asking for "1 gold pleeeeeeeaseee".

(by OPathu)

... Kethin pulled back the skin from her face just before she leered in to kiss the helpless Opathu...

- Lord have mercy, I know those glowing red eyes, horn-topped skull, bad acne, dodgy sailor's 'tache and goofy front teeth! screamed the orc. It's Arun... and he's coppin' a feel!!

A N A L! A N A L? came the reply from the heavy-breathing figure of Tenten, rising from the rubble like a dark phoenix.

[ Post edited by Opathu ]

(by Itas)

<Itas, drunken to the boot with mug of Cherry Grog in his hand crashed into Tyragon, who was leaving the bar.>
"Shorry ..."
<Itas eyed Tyragon.>
"Cherry grog?"
<Itas offered a drink to Tyragon. Tyragon opened mouth, clearly wanting to say something, when Itas slammed the mug into Tyragons nose. In a blink of a second, Itas snatched from somewhere another mug of cherry grog, turned by 180 degrees and back kicked Tyragon into his ... "jewels" and added a kick to the stomach, which sent Tyragon back into the bar. After sending paladin in he steps in, trips over Tyragon, manages to do some acrobatic trick and lands on his feet.>
"Dammish! ...hic! I have almosht dropped my booz..."
<Itas slipped on ping pong balls, took several steps backwards and lands on table next to the exit, crushing the table he fell on.>
"Hehe ... hic! I am Indeshtrucedibele ... "
<Itas thinks for a while.>
"Inshedructibel? ... hic! ... no no no ... Indirecshrudible? ... no! ... hic! IndeshBURP! ... shorry ... hic! Indeserthongsh? ... hic! BAAAH! Who the hell caresh ..."
<Itas starts to drink from his mug of chery grog, when suddenly a floating gorilla (called Opathu) crash-landed on him.>

(by Kethin)

Meanwhile Kethin was standing in the shadows, watching while Arun took her guise to attack Opathu. How she got over here from the the tavern was anyone's guess.

She cackled wickedly, stepping over Opathu as Tenten breathed the words
"Aaaanal... Aaaanall!!"

You see Tenten here is my minion, I have been pulling the strings the entire time. Surprised? Frightened? Oh.. you will be..

(by Emanee)

Wallach and Villey were sat in a corner doing... well it appeared to be a sudoku puzzle scrached into the back of an elven priestess.

Suddenly attacked by a barrage of ping-pong balls Wallach turned into a naked gnome, Villey into a crocodile, Emanee watched in fits of lol's and rofl's as the gnome frantically ran in cirlces (one of its legs appeared nailed to the nelf sudoku) as the crocodile took potshots at various limbs with a [Deadly Blunderbuss], and a monocle on its left eye.

At this point Emanee passed out.

(by Vania)

Kenu and Myrawen arrives. They look around, like looking for a fight, but still confused with the mass of people.

Myrawen points at Huor. Kenu nods and both goes towards Huor.

Opathu is bored and goes to Villey to talk.

"Oh no" Morgalyen exclaims.. "Not again...."

((More people... pls))

(by Huor)

After picking himself up from the explosions, ping pong balls, Orcs flying through windows and everything else that had been going on, Huor dusted himself off and was ready to go and find his ladies again when he spotted the two bearing down on him.

Backing into a corner, he reached for his Fist Weapons to find that they had been replaced with fish.

"Damn!", Huor drew his fish and prepared to meet Kenu and Myrawen head on.
The two stopped, their heads cocked slightly to the side, baffled by the naked Sin'Dorei wielding two 42 Pound Redgills.

This momentary break was all Huor needed. Inserting his small and index fingers into his mouth, he let forth a shrill whistle, and from the rafters onto Kenu and Myrawen dropped Hecter and Dihem.

The two rogues locked their arms around the assailants necks, and held on tight as they thrashed around, knocking over tables and chairs.

"Liontooth! To me my trusty steed!"
A hulking bear, in a pair of Deathblow XII Goggles made his way across the bar, mumbling about goddamn one-eyed Rogues, and lowered himself to allow Huor to jump on.

Kicking his feet into Liontooth's sides, he spurred the great bear into the fray, slapping and smacking everyone who got in the way with his fish.
Reaching out an arm, Huor hoisted Morgalyen up with him, before using Liontooth, his trusty steed, to barge a path through the mayhem towards Kethin, who he also hoisted up to join him.

"Aha! Now take us away from here, Liontooth, my trusy steed!", he bellowed, now smoking a cigar.
Liontooth, with a grumble, turned and proceeded to barge his way back through the crowd, the overturned tables and chairs.
As Huor passed by the stage, he randomly lashed out with his fish and smacked Archnazg with a near fatal fishy uppercut, sending the singer through the wall behind him.

Huor, his ladies, and his trusty steed Liontooth were about to burst out of the bar, when suddenly, Liontooth turned and set his eyes on a perfectly folded Assassination Set armour sitting on the bar.
"Liontooth! No Liontooth! It's for Rogues!! LIONTOOTH!!", but his cries were in vain, Liontooth had already turned and was charging back towards the carnage.

"Hold on, my darlings!"
Huor readied his fish for battle.

[ Post edited by Huor ]

(by Itas)

<Itas mumbles some nasty words from beneath of the gorillas back, struggles abit, making gorilla even more confused, and chanted a spell.>
"Elune! Please, help poor man!"
<WHOOOM! Chuck Norris appeared! He roundhouse kicked gorilla and send her on flight towards Huor mounted on Liontooth.>
"Oh, thank you oh mighty god!" <Itas bows.>
<Chuck Norris yawned, waved goodbye and WHOOOM! Vanishes.>

Vypra charged out of the corner where she had been making out with Vex brandishing a 52lb Grouper.
There was no way she was going to miss out on a fish fight!

Taking in the size of the melee before her, she skidded to a halt 'gonna need me a bigga weapon'.

She ran back to the dark corner, took a large swig of Darkmoon special reserve and charged back into the fray carrying Isha Awak.

[ Post edited by Vypra ]

(By Grendel)

A huge rent in the space time continuium rends the air in the bar knocking the brawlers left and right . Arcane fire belches fourth causing random green white and yellow numbers to appear over the patrons heads. Four sided triangles and right angled circles burst from the yawning maw as it spits out a glowing stage of naxarantim plated boiling metal brighter than a thousand suns and standing upon it using instruments borrowed from L70 ETC is Grendel and the other members of S C U M Two enormous [Gnomish Amplifier Stacks] thud down either side of the stage and the band burst into song

Don't wanna be an Azeroth idiot.
Don't want no more lag in Ogrimar
And can you hear the sound of hysteria?
All the way from Stormwind to Thunder Bluff

Welcome to a new kind of roleplay
No l33t speak telling me I’m geigh
Everybody used to be a N00b
Epic gear dreams of tomorrow.
Loose the need roll, wallow in sorrow
Makes me want to QQ.

You might be an Orc in a Dwarf pub
Or part of the PVP Twink club
Now everybody scream that they should nerf locks
And respec because your build sucks

Welcome to a wait for an expansion
Death knights and wrath of the litch king
Everybody grinding for 80
Epic gear dreams of tomorrow.
Ninja looters need on the boss roll
Think I’m gonna QQ

Don't wanna be an Azeroth idiot.
Don’t want gold spam in the trade talk
Or people trying to get banned.
It's going out to idiots in Outland

Welcome to a new kind of spamming.
Gnomes falling from ironforge ceilings
Waiting for a patch every wednesday
Raid wipes cos the priest was on follow
Guess we all should reroll.
Time for some more pew pew

With that the entire band bubble hearths and the equipment mysteriously morphs into a table full of delicious food and drink just begging to be used in a food fight

(By Kethin)

((lolololol))

Suddenly Kethin was pulled up onto a charging bear. Enraged, she whipped around to see just who it was who had done such a thing, but started once she saw the cigar smoking, fish weilding Huor. And low and behold Morgalyen was with them as well! Not having any of this, Kethin leant over and shoved Morgalyen beneath the gigantic paws of the charging bear.

Now alone at last with Huor, she drew her sword and swung it forward as they barreled back toward the carnage. "Tally ho!" she cried, jabbing the bear in the side to urge him onward.

(By Morgalyen)

Just before Morgalyen was crushed by Liontooth she managed to roll out of the druids way.

From her position on the floor she used her mind control to make Huor jump down from the bear leaving the bear without any guidance. Kethin looked back to see what Huor was up to. When she looked back she saw a very low ceiling beam closing in fast. Before she could duck her face connected with the beam breaking the poor Blood Elves nose.

(by Kethin)

Kethin did indeed get smacked in the head with an incoming beam. But because she was wearing her uber plate helmet of uberness (something the poor clothie priest could only dream about) the beam broke off upon contact with her head. Kethin took hold of the beam with both hands, and because she had BoK on had enough strength to lift it and jump down off of Liontooth before it was too late.

Throwing the beam to the side, she rushed forward and tackled Morgalyen, this move magically starting the famous kiddie pool jello-fight sequence from the point at which Quin became dragged into the fray as he suddenly appeared in between the two struggling bikini-clad healers.

(by Gurthang)

Just as things were about to really kick off, a banging was heard on the bar. Everyone turned to look as a familiar voice rang out "Has anyone got any duct tape?"
http://macgyver-tn.ytmnd.com/

(by Mundus)

Mundus makes an appearance, tosses his cloak around while throwing a few sexy poses, then vanishes as he's summoned to fend off evil elsewhere..

(by Morgalyen)

Quintilius spots from out the jello filled kiddy bathtub Opathu standing there in his pink underwear.
"Opathu, you look like a girl" Quint calls to him. Opathu comes stomping over there with fierce strides and rips Quints bony arm out of its socket.



((sorry, this one had to be added.))

( by Rultir)

Rultir walks into the bar and raises the Staff of Kralnor above his head. Everybody stops what they are doing to gaze in wonder at the staff. There is the sound of weeping from the back as someone is overcome with emotion.

Rultir intones: BY THE POWER OF THE STAVE OF KRALNOR, THIS PRP BAR FIGHT IS OPEN ONCE MORE!

(by Quintilius)

... A ping pong ball hits Rultir right in the forehead...